Chaotic Randomness

I am all anxietied out. Feelings and similar crap doesn’t matter-I can act the part, but I don’t really give a shit about anything.

I want to talk, but I have no idea what to say…

Good thing I edit before I publish, I had wrong words in. Not that anxietied is a /real/ word…but its apt.

I feel I should be more precise and give more about this, but I just don’t give a fuckkkk. I probably sound pissed off? I’m not. I’m just…just…I don’t even know. ¬.¬

Sometimes, like today, I think the best thing for me is to be locked up and the key thrown away. Permanent or at least a couple years until the shit goes away. The confusion, pain, being mentally/emotionally stuck, the voices to shut the hell up, the ShadowMan to go away and take TheMasses along with him, and his other hangers-on. Until I scream the blackness inside out, until the darkness leaves my tears and they run clear.

I. Don’t. Want. To. Be. Me. I want to just GO the Fuck AWAY. Why is that so hard to accomplish? Why do the tortures bind me here, no escape in sight? No escape on the horizon, or even the terrestrial edges of my own universe (personal hell)….